Washington Post submission

The Washington Post is looking for people to write in about how the Coronavirus is changing their lives.  Below is my submission.  Here' the link if you would like to submit one, max 800 words.

Here I am again!?!  I have MS; in mid-October I took a drug called Lemtrada that killed my immune system in the hope that it would rebuild itself in a way that stops it from attacking my nervous system.  I thought, I would need to hide out from germs for a month but as my immune system was slow to come back during cold and flu season; my one-month self-exile turned into three.  I was just starting to go back out into public a little at a time in mid-January as I watched Covid-19 spike in China and individual cases start to show up in other cities around the world.  I was getting back into the swing of things and making my triumphant social re-debut in February as I watched Covid-19 start to spread slowly around the world and small “hot spots” start to grow.  After the first death in Washington State was announced and we learned the virus had been circulating for 6 weeks and no one knew, I knew my time in the great big social world was limited.  My “killer Tcells” are only about 15% back to normal (the low end of normal) so any virus could hit me hard especially a brand new one that doesn’t have a treatment.  The CDC said to start getting prepared to start grabbing a few extra groceries each time you shopped, so I did.  I stocked the freezer and pantry.  The last time I was out and about was March 10^th; I was supposed go to three appointments.  At the first one I was so nervous that anyone in the office could have the coronavirus that I called into the last two from home.   I’ve only gone out once (for a blood draw) since then and also since then a majority of the world has joined me in home confinement including my two high schoolers and my husband.  Making it not so lonely this time but not any less scary.  All winter, we paid attention to anyone in the house being sick or if anyone in my family was around someone who was sick but now it’s critical that they pay attention to if anyone near them is sick or was that person who’s now talking to you near someone who was sick? Are they now contagious but not showing symptoms?  It can start to spiral quick and it’s enough to drive you mad but when you are in a vulnerable position you have to be on guard.  My family started washing hands as soon as they walk in the door again, carrying hand sanitizer with them and wiping surfaces down with antibacterial cleaners more often.  We also decided to ‘physical distance’ in the house for two weeks post-school closing.  That’s been really hard; not to be able to hug my family especially when everyone is worried.   It’s also worse this time because not only is it making life more inconvenient for us but it’s affecting our livelihood and the livelihood of our staff.  We own a restaurant and although we were already moving to carryout-only for the health of everyone; the City made it not-an-option and we had to re-organize our business model and lay-off employees.  This has been a very tough two weeks.  On a personal level, a professional level and a financial level.  We, like the majority of the Country, are looking at our monthly bills to figure out what can go.   

I keep using the word surreal to describe this situation because I don’t know how else to describe it.  Everything has been turned upside down.  I have had MS for 15 years.  I have never taken a medication this strong and THIS is the year I decide to do it.  I am supposed to do the second dose in October.  That will clearly have to wait until there is a vaccine.  It would be incredibly foolish of me to take my immune system down to nothing again with this virus floating out there.  My heart goes out to cancer patients and others who don’t have the option of waiting.  My hope is that something good will come out of all this mayhem when we get to the other side. Maybe there will be another baby boom in 9 months (start building birthing centers now) and maybe artists will create some amazing music, paintings and plays out of this.  I hope people will see why it’s so important that everyone has and can use healthcare (we will all be healthier for it) and I hope people are able to slow down enough to see that family, friends, community and our environmental are also vital to our well being.  Stay safe and healthy.